Boys, Men and Mental Health in 2026: What the Latest Suicide Figures and the Fonagy Review Are Telling Us

Boys, Men and Mental Health in 2026: What the Latest Suicide Figures and the Fonagy Review Are Telling Us

Kevin George
men's mental health

By Kevin George, BACP registered therapist and Senior Family Therapist. Published 18 October 2026.

Key points

  • On 13 October 2026 the Office for National Statistics (ONS) reported 6,162 suicides registered in England and Wales in 2025. The rate for men was 17.5 per 100,000, more than three times the rate for women at 5.5.

  • Men aged 50 to 54 had the highest suicide rate of any group in England and Wales, at 28.0 per 100,000.

  • On 9 October 2026 the government published the independent Fonagy review, which concluded that the rise in mental health problems among young people is real and that autism and ADHD are not being overdiagnosed at scale.

  • Government research published in June 2026 found that boys and young men with poorer mental wellbeing are far more likely to feel lonely.

  • Help does not have to begin with weekly therapy. A 25 minute online Check In with a BACP registered therapist is a practical first step for boys, men and the parents who are worried about them.

Why is men's mental health in the news this month?

October 2026 has delivered three stories that every parent, partner, teacher, coach and employer of boys and men should be paying attention to.

The first is the ONS release Suicides in England and Wales: 1981 to 2025, published on 13 October. The second is the Fonagy review into mental health conditions, autism and ADHD, published on 9 October by the Department of Health and Social Care and led by the psychoanalyst and clinical psychologist Professor Peter Fonagy. The third is World Mental Health Day on 10 October, which this year focused on lived experience being heard.

The weeks ahead matter too. November is Men's Mental Health Awareness Month and Movember. International Men's Day falls on Thursday 19 November 2026, which also marks one year since England published its first Men's Health Strategy, with an implementation report due by the end of this year. If there was ever a moment to talk honestly about boys and men, it is now.

What do the new ONS suicide figures say about men in England and Wales?

The headline is stability, and stability is not good news. The overall rate of registered suicides in England and Wales was 11.3 per 100,000 in 2025, almost unchanged from 11.4 in 2024. England's rate has now sat at 11.1 per 100,000 for three years running. Wales fell from 15.7 to 14.3.

For men, the picture is stark:

  • Men died by suicide at a rate of 17.5 per 100,000, compared with 5.5 for women.

  • Men aged 50 to 54 had the highest rate of any age group, at 28.0 per 100,000, the same pattern seen in 2024.

  • London had the lowest regional rate in England at 7.3 per 100,000. The North East had the highest at 14.0.

Think of it like a fever that has stopped climbing but has not broken. Nobody would send a patient home because their temperature had flattened at 39 degrees. A plateau at this height is a warning, not a recovery.

The ONS also notes that suicides cannot be registered until an inquest is complete. In 2025 the median wait between a death and its registration was 188 days in England and 249 days in Wales. In other words, these figures describe men we have already lost, often more than a year ago. The men and boys at risk today are the ones in our homes, classrooms, changing rooms and workplaces right now.

What did the Fonagy review find about young people's mental health?

The Fonagy review is a 600 page piece of work, and its central message is clear: the increase in young people's mental health problems is genuine and is affecting how they function day to day. It is not a story of a generation being labelled too easily. On autism and ADHD, the review did not find evidence of overdiagnosis at scale. It also found that changes in household income move mental health in the same direction, with rising income improving wellbeing and falling income worsening it.

Among its recommendations is that every ADHD and autism assessment provider, including private ones, should be regulated by the Care Quality Commission. The Health Secretary has committed to making that happen.

Why does this matter for boys? In my clinical work across SEND schools, alternative provision, youth justice settings and private practice, boys are very often the young people whose distress arrives as behaviour rather than words. When a boy's anxiety looks like defiance, or his low mood looks like laziness, the system tends to respond with sanctions rather than support. I have written about this pattern in The Boy Nobody Could Reach: Neurodivergence, Antisocial Behaviour, and the Systems That Keep Failing. A national review confirming that the need is real gives families, schools and commissioners less room to look away.

Why do boys and men find it so hard to ask for help?

Anyone who has played football knows what it means to play through an injury. You strap the ankle, you take a painkiller and you carry on, because stopping feels like letting people down. The ankle does not heal. It compensates, and the strain moves to the knee, the hip and the back. Many boys and men treat their mental health exactly the same way.

The compensation shows up in recognisable places: anger instead of sadness, withdrawal instead of conversation, overworking, heavy drinking, gambling, gaming through the night, or risk taking that looks like confidence from the outside. In Jungian terms, the persona of the man who copes is carrying the weight while everything he cannot show is pushed into the shadow. I explored what happens when men lose that persona in Neymar Was on the Bench. So Was the Boy You Used to Be.

Loneliness is the other half of the story. The government's June 2026 report on loneliness among boys and young men in England found that young men experiencing mental distress were roughly twice as likely to report feeling lonely as those who were not. Boys who had more difficulties with peers were around four times as likely to feel lonely. Isolation and poor mental health feed each other, and boys rarely announce either.

What does mental distress look like in boys and young men?

Distress in boys and men is frequently missed because it does not always look like sadness. Signs worth noticing include:

  • Irritability, a short fuse or anger that seems out of proportion

  • Pulling away from friends, family, sport or activities he used to enjoy

  • Changes in sleep, including staying up through the night on a phone or console

  • Falling school attendance, or Emotionally Based School Avoidance (EBSA)

  • A sudden drop in performance at school, work or in sport

  • Increased drinking, drug use, gambling or reckless behaviour

  • Repeating "I'm fine" while everything around him suggests otherwise

  • Talking about being a burden, feeling trapped or not seeing a future

That last sign always needs a direct, calm conversation and, where there is any risk, urgent support. The details are at the end of this article.

How long are children and young people waiting for mental health support?

Too long. The Children's Commissioner for England reported in June 2026 that more than a million children were referred to mental health services in a single year, almost double the number in 2018 to 2019. One in four Black children referred were already in crisis by the time they received care, compared with 7.4% of white children. The British Medical Association reported that in March 2026 only one in nine under 18s with a suspected diagnosis had a first appointment within the recommended 13 weeks. The Royal College of Paediatrics and Child Health found that the proportion of 8 to 16 year olds in England with a probable mental health disorder rose from 12.5% in 2020 to 20.3% in 2023.

Waiting lists are not a neutral pause. For a boy who has finally said something out loud, being told to wait months can feel like confirmation that nobody is coming. I wrote about this in The Check In: You should not have to wait months to talk to someone.

What can parents, partners and friends do to help boys and men open up?

You do not need clinical training to make a difference. You need to change the conditions of the conversation.

Talk side by side, not face to face. Many boys and men find eye contact during difficult conversations overwhelming. The car, a walk, a kickabout or cooking together all take the pressure off. Workplace research calls these sideways disclosures, and they are often how men first say something real.

Ask twice. The first "I'm fine" is usually reflex. A calm second question, such as "You sure? You've seemed a bit flat lately", tells him you noticed and you are not going anywhere.

Listen before you fix. Advice offered too quickly can sound like a request to stop talking. Reflect back what you heard before you suggest anything.

Use his world as a doorway. Football, music, gaming and hip hop are not distractions from mental health conversations. Used well, they are the way in. My work through Soccology CIC is built on exactly this principle.

Model it yourself. Boys learn emotional literacy by watching the men around them. A father, uncle, coach or older brother who can say "I've had a rough week and I talked to someone about it" teaches more than any leaflet.

Where can boys, men and parents get support from Kevin George?

I work with boys, young men, adult men, athletes and families, with particular experience supporting people who have found traditional therapy inaccessible. Sessions are available online across the UK and internationally, and face to face in Beckenham and London Victoria.

The Check In is an online 25 minute focused session for adults, young people and parents who want professional psychological support without committing to weekly therapy. You do not need to be in crisis or know exactly what you need. Think of it as a regular service for your mind, the way you would service a car before the warning light comes on rather than after it breaks down. Read more about The Check In.

Online Therapy offers full 50 minute individual sessions by video call, ideal if you prefer the privacy of home or live outside London. Book Online Individual Therapy (£110 per session). For why a registered human clinician still matters in an age of chatbots, read Online Therapy / Telehealth: AI can answer at 3am. It cannot know you.

If your son will not talk to a therapist, start with yourself. A Parent Consultation gives you a confidential 50 minute space to make sense of what is happening and plan practical next steps, without your child needing to attend.

Full details of individual, couple and family therapy are on the Individual, Couple and Family Therapy page. For anything else, contact Kevin George. All enquiries are answered within 48 hours.

If you or someone you know needs help right now

The Check In and therapy are not crisis services. If you are worried about someone's immediate safety, act now:

  • Samaritans: call 116 123, free, 24 hours a day

  • NHS 111: call 111 and choose the mental health option for urgent support in England

  • Emergency: call 999 or go to A&E if a life is at risk

  • Shout: text SHOUT to 85258 for free, confidential text support

  • CALM (Campaign Against Living Miserably): 0800 58 58 58, 5pm to midnight every day

  • PAPYRUS HOPELINE247: 0800 068 4141 for young people under 35 and anyone worried about them

 
 

FAQ Frequently asked questions about boys, men and mental health

Why is the suicide rate higher for men than women in the UK? In England and Wales in 2025, men died by suicide at more than three times the rate of women. Contributing factors include men being less likely to seek help early, distress being expressed through anger, alcohol or withdrawal rather than words, loneliness, and cultural expectations that men should cope alone.

Which men are most at risk of suicide in England and Wales? According to the ONS figures published on 13 October 2026, men aged 50 to 54 had the highest suicide rate of any age group in 2025, at 28.0 per 100,000.

Is the rise in young people's mental health problems real? Yes. The Fonagy review, published on 9 October 2026, concluded that the increase is genuine and affects everyday functioning, and found no evidence that autism and ADHD are being overdiagnosed at scale.

How can I get my son to talk about how he is feeling? Talk side by side during an activity, ask more than once, listen before offering solutions, and use the things he cares about, such as football, music or gaming, as a way into the conversation. If he will not see a therapist, a Parent Consultation can help you plan your next steps.

What is The Check In? The Check In is an online 25 minute session with Kevin George, a BACP registered therapist, for adults, young people and parents who want professional support without committing to weekly therapy. It is available as a single session or as a monthly subscription.

Can I have therapy online with Kevin George? Yes. Online individual therapy, couple and family therapy and The Check In are available by video call across the UK and internationally. Face to face sessions are available in Beckenham and London Victoria.

About the author

Kevin George is a BACP registered therapist (reg. 00947448), Senior Family Therapist and former professional footballer with West Ham United and Charlton Athletic. He is the Amazon No.1 bestselling author of Soccology and Director of Soccology CIC, a community interest company using football and culture as a gateway to mental health support for boys and young men. He has delivered mental health work across the Premier League, SEND education, prisons and youth justice settings, and has appeared as a clinical expert on BBC News, Sky News and ITV News.

References

Not Sure You Need Therapy? Start With a Check In

Not Sure You Need Therapy? Start With a Check In