Movember 2026: Why Boys Become Men Who Don’t Speak, and What We Can Do About It
Movember 2026 runs from Sunday 1 November to Monday 30 November. Across the world, men will grow moustaches, move and fundraise to raise awareness of men’s health, focusing on prostate cancer, testicular cancer, mental health and suicide prevention.
The moustache is the icebreaker. The conversation is the point.
Over my last two articles I explored how overprotection keeps children frozen in time, and how courage separates the remarkable from the safe. This Movember, I want to bring those ideas together, because they explain a great deal about why so many boys grow into men who struggle in silence.
The scale of the problem
In England and Wales, males have accounted for around three quarters of deaths by suicide since the mid-1990s. In 2023, the male suicide rate rose to 17.4 deaths per 100,000, the highest for males since 1999. Suicide remains the leading cause of death among men aged 15 to 49.
These are not just numbers. They are sons, fathers, brothers, teammates and colleagues. Many of them were the boy everyone said was “fine”.
Where it starts: the boy who was told he was strong
Children are often protected from the controlled, predictable stress they need to build genuine belief in themselves. Instead of the experience, they receive affirmations: “You’re strong.” “You’re a big boy.” “You’re fine.”
For boys, this has a particular sting. Many are protected from struggle and simultaneously told never to show it. They are denied the experiences that build real confidence, then given a script that says they must already have it.
The result is a boy who learns to perform strength rather than develop it. He puts on a brave face through failed exams, poor performances on the pitch and difficult friendships, while the people around him reassure him that he is doing well. He never collects the evidence that he can cope. He just learns to look like he is coping.
Think of a car with a warning light on the dashboard. The healthy response is to look under the bonnet. Many boys are taught, in effect, to put tape over the light. The car keeps running for a while. Then it breaks down on the motorway, far from help, at the worst possible moment.
Where it continues: the man who chooses the safe option
In Courage Over Comfort, I used Harry Kane’s 2026 Ballon d’Or and Tim Sherwood’s decision to pick him over a £26 million striker to explain the difference between safe and brave decisions. Safe decisions protect the decision maker. Brave decisions protect the outcome.
Men make safe decisions about their own wellbeing every day. Staying silent is safe: it avoids attention, pressure and scrutiny. Cancelling the GP appointment is safe. Laughing it off with the lads is safe. Working longer, drinking more and withdrawing from family are all safe in the short term because nobody has to see the struggle.
But just like the manager who picks the expensive striker to protect himself, these decisions protect the man’s image while harming his health.
Speaking up is the brave decision. Booking the appointment is the brave decision. Telling a mate “I’m not alright” is the brave decision. It brings exposure. It also brings the possibility of recovery.
The frozen boy inside the man
A child receives high levels of empathy and support. An adult does not. When a boy is kept frozen in time, he grows older without growing through the areas that were never challenged. He becomes a man the world is not patient with.
In over 20 years working across schools, alternative provision, prisons and young offender institutions, I have met this boy again and again inside grown men. The anger, the addiction, the failed relationships and the silence are often the warning light that was taped over years ago.
Why sport matters for men’s mental health
Movember funds projects that reach men where they already are, including sports clubs, workplaces and online. This is exactly right.
Sport gives boys and men something many other environments do not: predictable, controllable stress, clear feedback and a team around them. It is a place where they can fail safely, recover and go again. That process builds real resilience, not the performed kind.
It is also where men already gather and talk. My work through Soccology began with research involving 45 professional footballers, and one lesson stood out. Men will often speak more honestly side by side on the training ground than face to face in a formal room. Meet men where they are and the conversation follows.
What you can do this Movember
As a parent of a boy. Let him struggle with things he can overcome. Praise his effort and process rather than labelling him strong. Make it normal in your home for boys to name feelings, and model it yourself.
As a man. Make one brave decision this month. Book the check up. Tell someone the truth about how you are. Join a team, a club or a challenge that pushes you. Insight helps you understand your patterns; experience helps you change them.
As a friend, partner or colleague. Ask twice. “How are you?” invites “fine”. “How are you really?” invites the truth. Then listen without rushing to fix.
As a coach, school or employer. Build environments where challenge and support exist together. Explain your approach to parents and staff so they understand the why. Create routes for boys and men to speak that don’t require them to sit in a formal room first.
If you need help now
If you are struggling or worried about someone, you do not need to wait. In the UK you can call Samaritans free on 116 123 at any time, text SHOUT to 85258, or call CALM on 0800 58 58 58. In England you can also call NHS 111 and choose the mental health option. If someone is in immediate danger, call 999.
Key takeaways
Males account for around three quarters of suicides in England and Wales. Many boys are protected from growth and told to perform strength, leaving them frozen in time as men. Silence is a safe decision that protects image and harms health; speaking up is the brave decision. Sport and community settings offer the predictable stress and connection that build genuine resilience. This Movember, choose courage over comfort.
About Kevin George
Kevin George is a BACP registered psychotherapist, Senior Family Therapist and former professional footballer with West Ham United and Charlton Athletic. For over 20 years he has worked within education across state schools, SEND schools and alternative provision, and has delivered projects in adult prisons and young offender institutions. He supports families through private and community mental health programmes and runs Cerebro 1:1, his private practice in Beckenham and London Victoria, with sessions also available online. He is the Amazon No.1 bestselling author of Soccology and founder of Soccology CIC.
Work with Kevin
Therapy for individuals, couples and families. Kevin offers therapy face to face in Beckenham and London Victoria, and online across the UK, plus a check in subscription for consistent support between sessions. If you recognise the boy who learned to look fine, this is a good place to start.
Explore therapy services
Support for schools. Kevin works with schools to support boys’ mental health and build cultures of healthy challenge, with clinical support for pupils, staff and parents.
Explore school services
FAQ Frequently asked questions
When is Movember 2026?
Movember 2026 runs from Sunday 1 November to Monday 30 November 2026. International Men’s Day falls on 19 November.
What does Movember raise awareness of?
Movember focuses on men’s mental health and suicide prevention, prostate cancer and testicular cancer.
Why are men more likely to die by suicide?
The causes are complex, but contributing factors include reluctance to seek help, isolation and pressure to appear strong. In England and Wales, males have accounted for around three quarters of suicides since the mid-1990s.
How does childhood affect men’s mental health?
Boys who are overprotected from manageable challenges while being told to appear strong can miss the experiences that build real resilience. As adults, they may hide struggles until they become a crisis.
How can I help a man who is struggling?
Ask twice, listen without fixing, suggest doing something together side by side, and encourage professional support. If he is in danger, call 999.
Does sport help men’s mental health?
Sport offers predictable, controllable stress, connection and routine, which support resilience. It is also a setting where many men find it easier to talk.
Where can men find therapy in London?
Kevin George offers therapy face to face in Beckenham and London Victoria and online across the UK.
